Lesson 27: Above All Else I Want to See I repeat the lesson. If I feel it is a sacrifice (because I’m putting it ahead of everything else), I add: “Vision has no cost to anyone.” And additionally: “It can only bless.” Dutifully working through the practice. Lesson 28: Above all else I want to see things differently For a minute, looking at each thing, saying “Above all else, I want to see this —- differently.” I should mention here that I am seeing things differently. I’ve taken this time to step up and embrace some big shifts in my ways of being. So I’m seeing things differently and reacting to them differently. In fact, I’m feeling a little fried at the pace of the neurological changes. Lesson 29: God is in everything I see For this one, I look at things and say carefully: “God is in this —–” This is a lesson in seeing the divine in everything in everyone. Lesson 30: God is in everything I see because God is in my mind The lesson is to repeat this lesson. I’ve been working on a process called “Deep Thought,” where I put use a [...]
A friend of mine, Aaron Nichols, referred me to this great website “Healing Tao USA” (on the blogroll) for learning Taoist energy practices and I’d forgotten about it for over a year. I guess it was time now, because I was inspired to go back and find the link, bought his Sexual Chi Gong DVD (it’s called something different) and got the free ebook about the “Inner Smile” meditative practice. And being the kind of guy who learns by doing, I sat here at work and practiced the “Inner Smile.” And it was profound. I used a self-hypnosis trance to recreate the state of being a “happy infant” and used that energy as I went through the meditation, which is basically smiling from the inside – acknowledging yourself with neutral, loving, unconditional acceptance. It evoked a sense of inner peace and insight into creating a better relationship with myself, my energy, my relationship with my world, with others, and the universe. And the interesting part of this, this practice came to me after I asked for insight last night about “the next step” in my creating a powerful presence in the world. What came up was “share my essence.” This [...]
Lesson 25: I do not know what anything is for In this one I look around and hold my gaze on things. I say slowly “I do not know what this —- is for.” Feel into the not knowing the purpose of things. Feels very peaceful. It’s interesting how things integrate. I reconnected with the website of a Daoist teacher (its own post) and practiced an “Inner Smile,” which was an awesome experience. Things are lining up. And one interesting thing I had to also integrate was a simple test he gives for whether your energy is elevating – is your life more harmonious? And as busy as my life is, I have to say… yes. A lot more harmonious. I feel everything is growing more toward harmony and integration, piece by piece, day by day. And I haven’t even been practicing his stuff (or giving this ACIM work all that much attention) Lesson 26: My attack thoughts are attacking my invulnerability. Start by repeating the idea. Then think of something I am concerned about. “I am concerned about —–” Then go over the outcomes. “I am afraid —- will happen.” After naming each outcome, tell myself “That thought [...]
My path has taken some interesting turns lately. First, I had been dedicating my writing effort lately to fiction writing, which has been very rewarding. I’m well on my way to having at least rough drafts of two novels complete by the end of the year. The more I dive into this, the more I see this as my purpose. It’s been energizing and inspiring. Then, as I was thinking maybe the whole “personal transformation coaching” gig was not my path, certain things started popping up. I got some amazing feedback from guys who used my program, which inspired me. I found an NLP certification class and signed up. I found a self-hypnosis training program for creating peak states, which inspired me to begin hypnosis training, something that also seemed to just “find” me. And these are areas that inspire me in a powerful way, as much as the writing. Additionally, Jason McClain, whom I’ve been off-and-on working with on a major project of his, has a kick-ass website up with training and lots of cool things, affirming my decision to recommit to personal transformation coaching. And we’re moving forward on our project. Things are stacking on top of each [...]
This is a good one. Start with a situation with an uncertain outcome and think of what I want. “In this situation involving —–, I would like —– to happen, and —–, and ——-. But I do not perceive my own best interest.” This is one of those universal lessons that comes at us in so many ways. It seems every spiritual practice has its own version of this. And giving up attachment to an outcome is the only way to happiness… and to truly get what you want. So it’s good to keep practicing this and remind myself of this when I’m “wanting something” badly.
The world I am perceiving is a vengeful place. Each of my perceptions of “external reality” is my pictorial representation of an attack thought. As attack thoughts cross my mind, say to myself “I can escape from the world by giving up attack thoughts about —-” Going through this has led to moments of presence, in the midst of anger and stress. I’ve also been working more deeply with self hypnosis and peak states, so undoubtedly some of the peacefulness can be attributed to this practice as well. So it’s a good reframe at a compatible time.
Look at the world five times a day and say: I see only the perishable. I see nothing that will last. What I see is not real.What I see is a form of vengeance. At the end of each practice as “Is this what I really want to see?” Funny, this came at a time when I’m pretty pissed at the world. I’m in the middle of my “burning through” release where I sit in the anger and ask “is that all you’ve got?” As I challenge the anger, it is passing through me and that’s when I came upon the lesson. It’s true in my own life I’ve spent a lot of time bouncing between anger and fear. Anger and fear are byproducts of a perception of powerlessness, our natural coping mechanisms (“fight or flight”). It’s certainly a stressful way to live and the triggers are almost always imaginary.
Start with repeating the lesson. Then think of things or situations that anger me and repeat to myself: “I am determined to see (person I’m angry with) differently.” “I am determined to see (situation) differently.” And I am determined. I also feel a certain disbelief – will I really be able to see things differently? Will that ever really be possible? And this is someone whose made a lot of changes in his own life, and I’ve learned to let things go and find really deep presence, peace and confidence. But has my viewpoint changed, or have I just gotten better at dealing with it? I’m not seeing things differently, just dealing with them differently. The fundamental structure of my life is still the same, so can it be changed? Awesome if it can, not sure it will.
As much as I love personal evolution and embrace aspects of “Consciousness,” and have personally experienced the value of such efforts, I find periods where I get so sick of the bullshit attitude of a lot of the so-called “gurus” that I just want to punch these smarmy jokers in the face. Yah, not real “evolved,” but fuck it. Sometimes I could go for an ego-gratifying SNAG beat-down. Let’s see how your “yoga guru” designation and “mindfulness” fare against years of resistance training (aka “muscles,” yes us unevolved dudes have them) when I manifest my fist against your arrogant, hypocritical, intelligence-insulting face. It’ll be me hitting you, and you hitting your hemp mat and running crying back to your yogi while I let loose with a very ego-gratifying peal of laughter. While you’re energy healing your broken face, you can offer a prayer to the Divine Goddess, apologizing for the violent behavior of unevolved men like me. I’ll be too busy drinking Rioja and having dominant caveman sex with my female abettor of the patriarchal system, commonly referred to as “wife.” Aaaaahhhhh… that was a lovely thought. I feel much more centered and blessed now. When exactly did becoming a [...]