I switched up my stretching this morning and focused almost entirely on “heart opening” stretches, such as Camel Pose, Bow Pose, and Backward Bow, as well as a couple chest stretches that are “not yoga.” When I did these, I put my intention fully on feeling into my vulnerability and feeling into the emotions that came up. It felt vulnerable and exhilarating. I felt sadness and fear come up and I welcomed those feelings. Eventually I sat down and welcomed the feelings: “I accept myself as I am, I accept these feelings as they are, I accept my life the way it is.” Then I thanked the feelings, bringing my love and gratitude to these feelings. I held my hands together and felt that powerful energy, bringing that to my heart. I kept bringing gratitude, love and energy to my heart center, welcoming the emotions. Eventually they unstuck, and my heart center went from feeling tight and painful to feeling open. I’ve felt this calmness, this peaceful, loving feeling after this opening. It’s beautiful and it’s led to other stuck things un-sticking, like blogging and writing. I’ve also felt more present, more intuitive, less “in my head.” My heart attracts [...]
I’m starting to feel more acceptance around these lessons, and around my posting them here. This week I’ve felt resistance, especially to posting, and now I’ve let go and gave up worrying if my posts were good enough, or if I was putting enough energy into the lessons. I know I get what I need from these lessons and choose not to dwell on whether I’m “doing it right.” For this lesson, I observe my thoughts and say to myself “My thought about —– does not mean anything.” I feel an opening from this exercise, and more acceptance for doing the lessons as it’s right for me.
This lesson is about understanding the difference between the present and my interpretation/ imagination. I look at everything I see and say to myself “I do not see this —– as it is now.” As I’m going through this exercise, I notice I’m having to search my mind for the labels for the things I’m looking at. I take that as a positive sign. I had a major heart-opening this morning and I feel very present and relaxed. In this place, labels are not coming up for me. And I like that.
The lesson goes something like this. Notice what I’m thinking about. I seem to be thinking about ___. Then name each of your thoughts specifically, for example: I seem to be thinking about [name of a person], about [name of an object], about [name of an emotion], and so on, concluding at the end of the mind-searching period with: But my mind is preoccupied with past thoughts. This can be done four or five times during the day, unless you find it irritates you. If you find it trying, three or four times is sufficient. You might find it helpful, however, to include your irritation, or any emotion that the idea for today may induce, in the mind searching itself. Okay, but wait. I seem to be thinking about the novel I’m writing, about the plotline, about how to construct the story, about character development. This is something that didn’t exist until I started writing it. It existed as thoughts and inspiration, then refined into a story, with continual inspiration coming forth as I go through the process. I’m not in agreement that inspiration is a preoccupation with past thoughts. I can tell the difference between when I’m recycling an [...]
This one is about realizing everything I see is interpreted through my past experiences. So I look around and say this to myself: I see only the past in this pencil.I see only the past in this shoe. I see only the past in this hand. I see only the past in that body. I see only the past in that face. Going through these exercises is an interesting shift, coming to terms with how my assumptions operate my life and my view of everything in my world. Everything is colored by my past experiences of touching, feeling, memories associated. What opportunities are there for… maybe looking at things a different way? This is a good way to notice the water I’m swimming in.
Today I look at the things that are upsetting me through this mindset. Unlike yesterday, this one has an impact. Yah, I can feel this one. The ways in which my fears, worries and upset are imaginary. I’m seeing something that is not there. I can feel the “stacking” of these lessons.
It looks like this: I am not angry at ___ for the reason I think.I am not afraid of ___ for the reason I think. Again, being indiscriminate with the feelings and the sources of feelings. (“There are no small upsets.”) “I am not frustrated with A Course in Miracles for the reason I think.” “I am not angry with the guy on the train who chews his gum loudly for the reason I think.” And my takeaway on this… erm… not feeling it. It’s okay, maybe it’ll come later, or perhaps I “got” this lesson already apart from the course.
Lesson Two: I have given everything I see in this room [on this street, from this window, in this place] all the meaning that it has for me. Lesson Three: I do not understand anything I see in this room [on this street, from this window, in this place]. Lesson Four: These thoughts do not mean anything. They are like the things I see in this room [on this street, from this window, in this place]. Lessons Two and Three were over the weekend and Lesson Four is today. Even with all I’ve done to this point, it’s still a powerful shift understanding that “things” have no meaning, that “thoughts” have no meaning. And also where I automatically have been assigning meaning to things – like certain makes of cars or houses or other objects. I also realize there is a lot of social pressure to create and accept certain meanings for things, to buy into the illusion. It is often easier to give in and accept the illusion than to accept the truth, which is these things have no meaning aside from what I am giving them in this moment.
I’ve been receiving some positive feedback about my ebook. My work has been touching people and making a real difference in their lives. It feels really good to receive that affirmation from people, to have some tangible proof that what I’ve been doing is making people’s lives better. It encourages me to keep going and to recommit to my life path. It also helps me to refocus on the positive, to look at myself and my work in a positive, life-affirming way. So to those who have written me about how my book has made a difference in your life, thank you. You have made a difference in mine, too. Namaste.
I encourage you to go to the site and start your own journey. I’m going to start doing this day by day. Here’s the link: http://acim.org/Lessons/lesson.html Lesson One: Nothing I see in this room [on this street, from this window, in this place] means anything. For more details, please visit their site. I’m here to promote, not plagiarize What comes up for me is a sense of relief, I don’t have to mentally and emotionally “hold onto” the things around me.